| | Re: Religion and Science Kevin Wilson
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| | John Neal wrote in message <3A2DE97F.D6DE09@uswest.net>... (...) on their own. Why not, John? Most of the time, most of us can tell what's the right thing to do, and many of us do the right thing most of the time. Probably just as much of the time (...) (24 years ago, 6-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | Re: Religion and Science Steve Thomas
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| | | | Kevin, (...) I think we use terms like "a good and moral life" in different senses. When Christians say that atheists, agnostics, or people from other world religions lead "good, moral lives," they are speaking with reference to humanity as a whole (...) (24 years ago, 13-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | Re: Religion and Science Kevin Wilson
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| | | | Steve Thomas wrote in message ... (...) couple (...) disagreement. The widest gulf is in sexual "morals". The requirement to get married in order to have sex, for example, is one that many people nowadays don't subscribe to. Various Christian sects (...) (24 years ago, 13-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | Re: Religion and Science Dave Low
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| | | | | (...) I wonder about this -- maybe there are good sociological/behavioral reasons for 1+1 couples making better families (still a hot topic in Utah as far as I know). What type of marriage has been more common around the world, couples or multiple (...) (24 years ago, 13-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | Re: Religion and Science Dave Low
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| | | | | | | In lugnet.off-topic.debate, Dave Low posts before he's finished, the idiot: (...) This is not to say that well-adjusted people couldn't and don't live happily as a single person or in open relationships (or as a triple or quadruple (or sextuple cf (...) (24 years ago, 13-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | Re: Religion and Science Kevin Wilson
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| | | | | | | | Dave Low wrote in message ... (...) happily (...) (or (...) Exactly Dave. Polyamory is something suited to some people, certainly not all, probably not most: but most people never even consider it because it's outside the social norm. No family (...) (24 years ago, 13-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | Re: Religion and Science Dave Low
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| | | | | | | | | (...) Although I can imagine it would make life hard for the government! "Are you single or married? If married, to how many people of which genders?" Kevin, do you think polyamory (where did you find that expression, btw?) works better for (...) (24 years ago, 13-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Kevin Wilson
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| | | | | | | | | | Dave Low wrote in message ... (...) Heheh. Might move them towards treating everyone the same, single or married! (...) There's a whole polyamory subculture. Try doing a Google search, there should be plenty of hits. I first came across the term (...) (24 years ago, 13-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Christopher L. Weeks
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| | | | | | | | | | | (...) I wonder how much of our societal unacceptance of polyamory is based on the desire for control? It would be harder for the government to keep track of stuff, but so the hell what? But for those who think that kind of control is good, I can see (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | (...) This is pretty typical of the crap that polyamorists spew in an attempt to make themselves seem enlightened. First of all, what state is forcing morality on anyone? As far as I know, in most state adultery isn't even illegal. Many religions (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Kevin Wilson
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | Lorbaat wrote in message ... (...) never (...) Why do you think it's important to look for one person who does fill all ones needs, Eric? Do you think it's likely that one would find such a person? ALL needs? Your use of the term "copping out" seems (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) That's great for both of you. I note with interest that you snipped away the part where I said I didn't see anything wrong with dating multiple people, as long as *all* people involved in *all* the relationships are aware of what's going on. I (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) I suppose it really depends on how you let the other person view the relationship. (...) I'd choose the one who needed me most. Scott A (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) That's an easy answer, but I'm not so sure it would be a comfort to the person who needed you greatly but, in your opinion, not as much as the other person. Or, worse yet, felt they needed you more, but you disagreed. eric (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Life is full of such decisions. Scott A (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Kevin Wilson
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Lorbaat wrote in message ... (...) to (...) the (...) as (...) what's (...) I snipped it away because in spite of what it said, your use of the term "copping out" seemed to me to show that you *did* see something wrong with it. You didn't answer my (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) As I said to someone else, I'm not going to get bogged down in a semantic argument. (...) This: "Your use of the term "copping out" seems pejorative to me: I personally have no interest in looking for one person to fill all my needs, and I (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Tom Stangl
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Bull. Committing to multiple people requires MORE trust between all involved, and can involve more commitment, as you are going against "the norm" in your daily life. (...) And why do you seem to think polyamory would only involve romantic (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Really? How? I see it as hedging your bets, leaving yourself an out. (...) Don't confuse commitment to what you're doing to commitment to a person. Once again, if you are dividing yourself between X and Y (not to mention possibly seeking Z) (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Tom Stangl
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) I think the divorce statistics in the US prove that monogamists leave themselves an out quite often. (...) It can also involve FAMILIAL love, which you seem to push as the sticking point for the cases of "people in need". (...) That's (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Kevin Wilson
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Lorbaat wrote in message ... (...) my (...) to (...) Too much snippage. The entire paragraph you're quoting from contained questions just before your quote: (...) I'm still interested in your answers. (...) that (...) that (...) logic, (...) A (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Ah. I assumed they were somewhat rhetorical at best- at worst, they have nothing to do with the question at hand. But here are my answers: (...) Who said I thought it was important? I never said that I thought it was important or necessary to (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Christopher L. Weeks
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) As deep as any relationship can be. That's like asking how much can you love your mother if you're having to think about loving your father. Love is not finite. You don't have 100 points of love to spread around and so the more people you have (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) No, not really. When you're committed to one other person, no part of your brain is seeking another person, or giving attention to another person you're already seeing. (...) No, they're thought experiments. Yours apparently failed. (...) Not (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Christopher L. Weeks
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Eric, from this an another note of yours, it is clear that I approached this conversation with the wrong tone. I will seek to be more neutral herein. (...) What about your friends? Can you have friends that supply you with forms of entertainment (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Yes, but it doesn't mean I have romantic feelings for them. I am capable of caring for someone without wanting to <thinks of a Lugnet-acceptable term> get it on with them. (...) Appreciating someone's physical attractiveness doesn't require (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Tom Stangl
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Then they are no worse off than if they were in a monogamous relationship? Seems to me you proved polyamory is the better choice here - no more negatives than monogamous, yet the possibility for more positives. (...) You can't fit ANY one (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Have you really thought that through? Person A has to choose between being with Person B and Person C. He chooses to be with B. C now has no one to be with, despite being in a "committed" relationship. I don't see how a person in a (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Tom Stangl
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Yep, that pretty much covers monogamy. Polyamory/polygamy, though, has Person D (or E/F/G/etc) also. (...) You haven't thought about what I've been saying, obviously. (...) Definitely. You seem to think that having MORE people that care about (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) You missed my point, and it's my fault. Person A is in a relationship with both persons B and C. B and C both want A to do something, and A cannot do both (what those things are doesn't matter). A is forced to choose, merely by dint of being (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Tom Stangl
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Yet you continue to ignore the fact that polyamory or polygamy CAN result in familial love (multiple children from mixed "couples"), so it does have bearing. -- Tom Stangl ***(URL) Visual FAQ home ***(URL) Bay Area DSMs (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory James Brown
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) (not interested in the debate, just forgot to add .debate back into my skip filter, and this caught my eye) If this is your argument against polyamory, then it's also your arguement against any kind of familial relationship. Person A = parent (...) (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) In the consulting racket, that's what we call a "drive by"... "I'm not interested in your discussion but I did have to put this one point in, and now I'm ignoring you again so don't bother trying to refute it as I won't see it" (overstated for (...) (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) That is pretty much what you have said to me a few times. Scott A (...) (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory James Brown
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Yup, you're right. My bad. Doesn't make my point any less valid, though. I'll stick around like a good little boy, to see if anyone wants to refute it, or debate it. James (BTW, that looked a lot like a snipe, Lar. Albiet a friendly one. :) (24 years ago, 19-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Yes, I think I agree with you on this. Life is a series of choices. The question that has bearing may be whether polyamory tends to give you richer choices or tends to make you make harder compromises. That would be a metric I'd judge it by, (...) (24 years ago, 19-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Christopher L. Weeks
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) I think the general truth is probably that it does both. You have open a richer body of choices and experiences, but you do also lose some things. That may include tougher compromises. Many were discussed, but they were hypothetical. The (...) (24 years ago, 19-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Kevin Wilson
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Lorbaat wrote in message ... (...) want (...) all (...) want to (...) you (...) that? This is a real issue, and different groups of people resolve it differently. Poly groups are not all the same, there are a lot of different structures developed by (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Yes, I know. Hinge, triangle, primary/secondary, etc (those are the only ones everyone seemed able to agree on). (...) Right. But my point stands- you're forced to make a choice that you would not be forced to make if you were committed to (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Dave Schuler
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Out of curiosity, Kevin, do you think it's impossible to find such a person? Or, conversely, do you think it's possible to find any combination of people to meet ALL of one's needs? Is it even necessary that ALL needs be met? I'm not blasting (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Kevin Wilson
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Dave Schuler wrote in message ... (...) I don't like to say impossible... but certainly improbable. A combination of people is more likely. But in fact I think you're right that ALL needs should not be expected to be met - apart from anything else, (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Christopher L. Weeks
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) I think that the reason we surround ourselves with social relationships of various kinds is to satisfy needs. (Needs in the soft sense, really more appropriately called desires.) I agree with Kevin that it is highly unlikely that anyone ever (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Not to put too fine a point on it, Chris, but given the above, isn't your accusing me of having an attitude, and asking who the hell I think I am to make judgements, and calling my use of the term "copping out" a bad thing just a little, tiny, (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Christopher L. Weeks
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) make (...) Um...No. I don't even see the link. Are you reacting to the word foolish? How would you feel if I replaced the word foolish with 'probably a bad idea' or 'needless'? Chris (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Really? You don't see the link between asking what place of mine it is to judge another person's relationship choices, and then saying that seeking a monogamous relationship is "foolish" (or below, "needless", or "probably a bad" idea? (...) (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Tom Stangl
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Um, EVERY US state? Polygamy is illegal, so there are many rights you lose by having an "under the books" polygamous marriage (try visiting a 2nd wife/husband in the ICU. Try asking for property from a death if you aren't specifically listed (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) So? Legal marriage is a mass of pitfalls, anyway. For example: (...) Although this is outside the question at hand, I certainly agree with this sentiment. But it illustrates my point as well, legal marriage is a fairly narrow band. And (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Tom Stangl
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | Well you can't prove the positive either, so keep an open mind on it. (...) -- | Tom Stangl, Technical Support Netscape Communications Corp | Please do not associate my personal views with my employer (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Christopher L. Weeks
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) a (...) state (...) make (...) The only problem that I see with this explanation is that it's made up. I mean, I think it is. At best it's conjecture. (...) Ummm...all of them. I assume that you mean state as in national government, not states (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) I'm sure. You're right, in most states they are. When was the last time anyone was convicted of them, though? When was the last time someone was *arrested* for them? (...) Given the state of politics in this country, it's pretty clearly not in (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Tom Stangl
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Happens all the time, as do convictions. They just don't make the news much. Read Playboy (I do. Hell yes I look at the pictures, but there's a lot of good reading there!), they bring up the ridiculous nature of some of these morality laws all (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Really? Then it shouldn't be much work for you to actually answer my question and point to a case where someone was arrested and convicted of one of these acts (and NOT for prostitution). (...) Yes, stupid blue laws still on the books can be (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Tom Stangl
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) They're not amusing when you are the one being prosecuted. Many of the stories in there aren't "look at this stupid law noone enforces", they are "I can't believe they ARE enforcing this law on Mr/Mrs. X". (...) I married one. If polygamy were (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) So, as I said, it shouldn't be too hard for you to whip out a Playboy and cite a case example. (...) OK, so you married one. What was keeping you from carrying on a relationship with both after that? What was keeping you from marrying neither (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Tom Stangl
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Except that I have NO idea where they are - they're buried in with millions of car mags. I don't put them on an altar or anything. (...) Good question. At the time, personal choice. I grew away from the other woman. I can tell you that IF (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Heh! No, I wasn't suggesting that you did. But still, saying "there have been cases! Really!" Doesn't cut it. Or, to put it another way, "I read in the Boston Globe once that a guy got arrested for painting his house green! He was convicted (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Tom Stangl
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) The latter. -- Tom Stangl ***(URL) Visual FAQ home ***(URL) Bay Area DSMs (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) These aren't EXACTLY on track, but they're close, and both of these things happened in West Michigan and both are pretty well documented in media archives. I am working from memory so may not have all the facts 100% straight. - A teacher was (...) (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Provide a cite Larry - it would help make your point credible. (...) Are you saying the board had a right to sack him as he was gay? That is your usual line of argument is it not? Scott A (...) (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) OK, here you go: for the details of Gerry Crane and how he was hounded to death for being gay, try going to Yahoo and using the search string "Byron Center Gay" This article from Time is from the beginning of Gerry's ordeal: (URL) the details (...) (24 years ago, 16-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) It is the exact opposite. (...) Usually, you tell me that they should be able to. Usually you say such institutions will discover such actions are bad - and the market should decide. I'll ask you again, do you think any school, public or (...) (24 years ago, 16-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Tom Stangl
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Scott, why do you waste everyone's time with totally useless questions? This is plowed ground IN THE ACTUAL POST. Larry stated quite clearly his position. I don't see how much clearer it can be, and if you can't see the answer, you really (...) (24 years ago, 16-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | "Tom Stangl, VFAQman" <talonts@vfaq.com> wrote in message news:3A3BB6C5.A05F09...faq.com... (...) is your (...) more (...) able (...) including (...) way. (...) position. I (...) really (...) to explain (...) already done (...) It is also not clear (...) (24 years ago, 17-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | Scott: (...) You really are a bit dense sometimes, Scott... Quoting myself in the *very paragraph* you're supposedly "responding" to.. (...) Is that so hard to understand? In shorter sentences: Public (government funded) no. Private yes. Like I've (...) (24 years ago, 16-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | "Larry Pieniazek" <lpieniazek@mercator.com> wrote in message news:G5oq6B.9Hv@lugnet.com... (...) more (...) able (...) including (...) including (...) in (...) governments. Why? Why should public/private be different? Do they not operate in the (...) (24 years ago, 17-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) If you can't grasp the distinction here, there's not much hope (...) Nope. (...) Nope. Government, in view of its great competitive advantage (it *makes* the rules) must be tightly constrained. (...) Yes, but in cases where there is a public X (...) (24 years ago, 18-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | You are wasting my time Larry. Go back and reply to my full text - do not conveniently delete text to suite _your_ point. This discussion is about a point I raised - do me the decency of answering it, rather than raising issues of your own - or (...) (24 years ago, 18-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | (...) When a state says that a contract between a man and a woman has more standing or more importance, that is, that it is recognised as a special kind of contract, when compared to a contract between a man and a man or a man and two women (like i (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | (...) State? I think you mean society. Scott A (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Frank Filz
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) No, I'm sure he means State/Government. If you distil "society" (as you're referring to it here) down, it amounts to two forces: - market (in that if "society" frowns upon certain activities, there will be influence on cost/benefit analysis (...) (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Well, in the society I am part of polyamory and polygamy are not socially acceptable. Scott A (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) And your point is what, exactly? (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) <larry snipped the rest of the text which explained the point I made - funny that> (...) My point is clear - nobody is forcing anyone to believe that polyamory and polygamy is not socially acceptable - the society I live has decided is not, (...) (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) You say "government" like it were an entity which just appeared after some sort of a coup. Here in the UK, the government exists "create an open and inclusive society, where rights are balanced with responsibilities, and where every citizen (...) (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | Plowed ground alert. (...) For now. Subject to whim reversal, of course, since you have no mandated and irrevocable protections of your rights (neither do we, but ours are a bit harder to water down since they are in the Constitution, and the ones (...) (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) In many ways, our rights are stronger than your own. It is true, I don't have the right to carry a gun to church - but I don't want it. Scott A (...) (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Provide a cite please. That is, show how your set of rights are *harder to change* than ours, not that they currently give you more or less freedom. (1) That's the point I'm making, which you missed. 1 - they give you less, regardless of what (...) (24 years ago, 16-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) My point is "ploughed ground" Larry. (...) It takes >1 to debate Larry. Scott A (...) (24 years ago, 16-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Funny, I don't recall you answering this question before. I *do* recall you dodging it, though... Provide a cite to where you provided a cite, then... ++Lar (24 years ago, 16-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | "Larry Pieniazek" <lpieniazek@mercator.com> wrote in message news:G5oqA2.9qK@lugnet.com... (...) to (...) freedom. (1) (...) you (...) I'm not going to do your homework for you again. If you are interested in my point - go find it. Scott A (...) (24 years ago, 17-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) You have never done it for me in the past, so "again" is an incorrect usage. The US has a constitution, which trumps individual laws. Laws have to theoretically be voted on separately, not just put in place by ministers subject to votes of (...) (24 years ago, 17-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | "Larry Pieniazek" <lpieniazek@mercator.com> wrote in message news:G5pyGI.Dss@lugnet.com... (...) my (...) usage. Well, there was that time you were curious about my doctortate. (...) fiat (...) Not my point Larry. However, you are still wrong. Much (...) (24 years ago, 17-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Which you never did answer, really. A one line answer was all that was required, but after about 5 tries, I finally dragged out of you that you're some kind of Civil, but not what kind. See, when I refuse to do homework for you, it's avoiding (...) (24 years ago, 18-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | You are wasting my time Larry. Go back and reply to my full text - do not conveniently delete text to suite _your_ point. This discussion is about a point I raised - do me the decency of answering it, rather than raising issues of your own - or (...) (24 years ago, 18-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) To have this charge come from you, the premier time waster of the entire .debate group, as everyone knows, is so laughable as to be beneath any further response. (...) We've had this discussion before, I am not going to reply to every snipe (...) (24 years ago, 18-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | <topped> (...) <tailed> Indeed. If you can not answer my points... there is no point. If you ever manage to get a response together, I'll re-enter this discussion with you. If you need me to explain myself further, perhaps I can draw you a picture - (...) (24 years ago, 18-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) When you actually manage to coherently make a point that hasn't already been answered in depth, do let us all know, won't you? I won't be holding my breath. All the points I could glean from your ramblings have been answered. Pity you can't (...) (24 years ago, 18-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) OK Larry. I'll play your game again. Let's revist this message: (URL) this text: =+= The point I was making about rights concerned political freedoms. For example - here in the UK one could always choose to be, say, a communist. Can you say (...) (24 years ago, 19-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) I'm not going to play yours though, or at least I'm going to try very hard not to. Too disruptive. If someone else wants to try, they are free to give it a go if they like, but I see it as a waste of effort. Me, I've got better uses for my (...) (24 years ago, 20-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) OK. That is, I think, the 3rd time you have abjectly failed to answer that point. I would have thought more of you if you had just not replied - rather than adopt this "holier than thou" attitude. I can't say I'm surprised though. Scott A (...) (24 years ago, 20-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) I haven't failed to answer your point, I merely refuse to play your game. Think about the difference. (...) By the way, in order for me to be concerned about what a person thinks of me (in a particular area), I have to have respect for that (...) (24 years ago, 20-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | respect... (was Re: Polyamory) Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | True to form Larry, you have resorted to personal insults. I think one of your countrymen once said: "When people do not respect us we are sharply offended; yet deep down in his private heart no man much respects himself." I largely agree with that (...) (24 years ago, 20-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Theory vs. practice (was Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | All of what I say below is plowed ground, stuff I and others have said before, so those that pay attention are invited to skip this entire post. They already know this stuff. Scott, though, might want to pay attention, for once. I won't hold my (...) (24 years ago, 16-Jan-01, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Theory vs. practice (was Re: Polyamory Eric Joslin
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Balance snipped. Out of curiousity, Larry, do you think anyone other than you or Scott really cares about any of this? If it is all plowed ground, why post it all again? Is it so necessary for you to feel good about your debating technique (...) (24 years ago, 16-Jan-01, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Theory vs. practice (was Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) As he enjoys playing to the crowd. (...) I _feel_ the contrary. I have promised many times to leave LP alone - if he does the same with me. However, I feel he just can't resist taking a shot at me. Look at this thread the message he just (...) (24 years ago, 16-Jan-01, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Theory vs. practice (was Re: Polyamory Dave Schuler
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Is it necessary to make this a conditional promise? Can't each involved party rise to the moral high ground and ignore the other? (...) That comes from driving on the wrong side of the road and using that crazy metric system of yours. 8^) (...) (24 years ago, 16-Jan-01, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Theory vs. practice (was Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Call it MAD (mutually assured destruction). (...) Ah Dave very topical. Thirt years on, some of us Brits have still not went metric: Grocer trial told of 'metric threat' (URL) the US, you have your gun debate we have this! Scott A (24 years ago, 16-Jan-01, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Theory vs. practice (was Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) After Scott beat me up for not answering it. Not just once or twice, either. Make up your mind, Scott, did you want it answered or not? ++Lar (24 years ago, 16-Jan-01, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Theory vs. practice (was Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) What are your thoughts on this? Are you willing to set aside your snide remarks? (...) Larry, It goes without saying that there many questions which on which Id like to hear you opinions. Such as: (URL) I re-stated again the question to you (...) (24 years ago, 16-Jan-01, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Theory vs. practice (was Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Wrong again. See: (URL) (...) Very interesting, but none of that answered my point: "In many ways, our rights are stronger than your own" I note that I was talking about actuality - not theory. But, again, you chose to squirm. Despite that, (...) (24 years ago, 16-Jan-01, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | (...) I'm genuinely flattered that you think that. However it's not true. It only takes one good debater (someone who knows how to think critically and who doesn't just *snipe*) to debate me, not an entire team. Perhaps you're starting to feel (...) (24 years ago, 17-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | (...) No. I wrote state because I meant state. Societies can't express preferences. Members of societes can (forcibly) *impose* their preferences on other members, through the mechanics of the state, but the society as a whole cannot have a (...) (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | (...) I think they can. (...) I accept that the majority in a society can implement change - we call it democracy. Scott A (...) (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Larry Pieniazek
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| | | | | | | | | | | | (...) You're not paying attention, Scott. The very next paragraph explains why a society cannot express a preference. The majority of members can hold a preference and can use the organs of the state to impose their view, but a society, since it is (...) (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Scott Arthur
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| | | | | | | | | | | | (...) Does a society not express a preference in a referendum? (...) I think you are putting words in my mouth Larry - and they are all the wrong ones. (...) I feel a little sorry for you Larry. You sound so bitter at what you feel your fellow man (...) (24 years ago, 15-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Tom Stangl
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| | | | | | | | | | (...) While it may work better for "bent" (non-straight, bent, same derision implied) people, polyamory certainly doesn't exclude "straight" people. Men sharing women while the women share men CAN work (not that I've tried it, but I wouldn't exclude (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | | | Re: Polyamory Kevin Wilson
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| | | | | | | | | | Tom Stangl wrote in message <3A38F3DE.3C147982@n...pe.com>... (...) implied) (...) Not at all, and I hope I didn't imply that exclusion. Many poly people are het... just a majority of the ones I know identify themselves as bi. Kevin (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | Re: Religion and Science Christopher L. Weeks
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| | | | | | | | (...) Why do you say probably not most? (...) Right. I'm sure that if you polled people, you would find that right now they believed that such a lifestyle is not for them. But I wonder if they're just wrong because we're conditioned to only accept (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | | | Re: Religion and Science Kevin Wilson
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| | | | | | | | Christopher Weeks wrote in message ... (...) I was thinking of people-as-we-are-now, not people-as-we-might-possibly-be :-) Rightnow, almost everyone is brought up on the ideal of monogamy (eg all the teenage angst material about "my best friend (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | Re: Religion and Science Christopher L. Weeks
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| | | | | | (...) I don't think so. I think that it's pretty clear that the model that is less popular in North America now than it once was, with grandparents hanging around helping is superior to the two-parent-and-2.3-kids model. In general, larger natural (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | Re: Religion and Science Dave Low
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| | | | | | (...) This makes sense, but I'm not sure the grandparents/coparents analogy holds. Note: this is all off the top of my head, feel free to throw in some real data. Grandparents are an inevitability (if they're still around when the third generation (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | | | Polyamory (was: Religion and Science) Christopher L. Weeks
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| | | | | | (...) Well, I think the role of grandparents in that family model is certainly different than the role of extra 'parents,' but I'm not sure that the difference is important. At least not to my point, which is that more adults is more of a buffer for (...) (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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| | | | | | Re: Religion and Science Steve Thomas
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| | | | Kevin, I responded to your post above in a new thread (something more appropriate than "Religion and Science") called "Christian morality". Thanks and take care, Steve (24 years ago, 14-Dec-00, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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