Subject:
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The wife problem
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Newsgroups:
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lugnet.loc.uk
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Date:
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Mon, 13 Dec 1999 21:17:34 GMT
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Viewed:
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410 times
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Scott's amusing post prompted me to start this as a new thread;
Basic deception
Keep the new stuff in the boot of the car (or some other place she
doesn't look, eg the garage, shed etc) until she's out - difficult if
you buy stuff while out shopping with her though. Be careful she doesn't
go in the boot before you've had a chance to move the stuff indoors
though or you're in double trouble (buying the stuff in the first place,
then not declaring it).
Economy
Be economical with the truth about how much that Club-Car actually cost
you. Unless she reads your mail she'll be none the wiser, and it looks
just like any other small set. If you keep set numbers out of the
dialogue she won't be able to cross-refer either - pinning you down
would take real commitment on her part. Difficult with big sets though.
The 'feel good factor'
When you hold an auction, be sure to show her the cheques and notes as
they drop through the door. 'Look dear - this means that the lego I buy
costs nothing'. Takes patience, but keep at it. You never know, it might
work.
The guilt trap
Many a criminal has succumbed to guilt and actually confessed all.
Temper the guilt by reminding yourself of all the things she buys with
*your* money that you wouldn't otherwise buy - women's magazines, stuff
for the house (that you don't like anyway). Less effective if she earns
too though.
The excitement trap
When that Metroliner turns up you are so excited you just have to tell
someone. Just ensure that it's not the wife. Especially difficult if she
is the first person you meet. Keeping in mind the consequences will help
(the sulking, the spare bed, withholding of privileges ;) etc
The teetotal card
If you don't drink or smoke you have the ideal excuse to spend a fortune
on lego. Consider giving up either or both and trade one addiction for
another. Ineffective if you drink or smoke, unless you resort to
deception about this too, in which case refer to basic deception above.
The sweetener
Ahh that timeless classic - just buy her flowers or chocolates prior to
the arrival of that parcel or the purchase of a new set. Very difficult
when you see something second-hand lego in the paper. Looks too obvious
when you return with lego *and* chocolates.
The comparison
Justify the cost by comparing the minimal cost of your lego hobby with
that of other more expensive hobbies. Only works within limits.
Disclaimer in the interests of political correctness; I am only joking!
Honest dear.
<Set female flame protection shields to full>
Ian Bishop, Ayrshire, UK
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Message has 7 Replies:
 | | Re: The wife problem
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| I also find that a carefully (mis)balanced barter systems works passably well. For example, when we are in a shopping mall, for every twenty mintues we spend at stores of her choosing, I get five in one of my own. The same can be applied to LEGO: (...) (25 years ago, 13-Dec-99, to lugnet.loc.uk)
| | | Re: The wife problem
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| Ian Bishop <ian@goodlife.demon.co.uk> wrote in message news:JEjHttAuJWV4Eww...n.co.uk... (...) <stuff snipped> Excellent Ian! I think Jason knows all the tricks of the trade, but even he may learn from your post. Huw (25 years ago, 13-Dec-99, to lugnet.loc.uk)
| | | Re: The wife problem
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| The main problem for me (my wife) is the space it all takes up... especially so near Christmas. This explains why one of my filing cabinets at work is full of Lego. The money thing does not bother her quite so much, as our Lego is more or less self (...) (25 years ago, 13-Dec-99, to lugnet.loc.uk)
| | | Re: The wife problem
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| Absolutely brill. I've played most of these cards at one time or another. And I thought I had things pretty much under control of late. I even made vague noises about sticking to a budget, not spending more than I took in and all other sorts of rash (...) (25 years ago, 14-Dec-99, to lugnet.loc.uk)
| | | Re: The wife problem
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| (...) I like the Phony Office-Gift-Exchange trick (although it only works once a year, but every brick counts). Tell her you have to buy a $15 gift for [insert phony name here] at the office for a Secret-Santa kind of deal. Wrap it, take it to work, (...) (25 years ago, 17-Dec-99, to lugnet.loc.uk)
| | | Re: The wife problem
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| Ian Bishop <ian@goodlife.demon.co.uk> wrote in message news:JEjHttAuJWV4Eww...n.co.uk... (...) In December the best one is to pretend that the large bag of next year's sets you are bringing in from the car might have her christmas present in, so (...) (25 years ago, 17-Dec-99, to lugnet.loc.uk)
| | | Re: The wife problem
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| (...) Honesty is the best policy. Tell her about all the sets you bought The ridiculus prices you paid at auctions Try to get her to share your obsession with bricks Always make sure she sees you reading the catalogues and instructions night and day (...) (25 years ago, 18-Dec-99, to lugnet.loc.uk)
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