Subject:
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Re: On the recursive subdivision of two-dimensional food items
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Newsgroups:
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lugnet.off-topic.geek
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Date:
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Mon, 16 Aug 2004 16:26:53 GMT
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Viewed:
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1036 times
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In lugnet.off-topic.geek, Todd Lehman wrote:
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Last night at IHOP, after copious amounts of beer at Rocklands, a few of us
were talking about how we cut our food up into differently-sized portions
during the eating process, and I realized that an algorithm exists for
maximizing the total enjoyment of a given serving of food...
Here’s what you do: Instead of just woofing your way linearly through a
stack of pancakes or french toast -- and constantly being aware of exactly
how much you have left to go, and being sad near the end -- what you do is
use recursive subdivision and eat the resulting pieces in a specific order.
Let e (epsilon) be the smallest bite size you are willing to eat, and
consider the following pseudocode:
Procedure Savor (Piece A)
If the size of A is less than 2e
Eat A.
Else
Subdivide A into two equal portions B and C.
Hide B from yourself (the edge of the plate is fine).
Savor C.
Savor B.
End If
End Procedure
I was so excited about this! and here’s why: First, every time you return
from procedure Savor and pop stack, you get a whole new piece of food that
you didn’t know you had (because you hid it from yourself)! Second, that
new piece of food is at least twice the size of the piece you just ate!
So at every step, not only are you surprised by how much you have left,
but you also begin to feel like you have a nearly infinite supply of food!
Third, only at the very last step do you pop stack to nothingness (a sad
event indeed); however, at the point this happens, you’ll’ve just eaten a
very, very small piece (as opposed to a large piece), making the transition
to nothingness relatively painless and Zen-like.
I tested the algorithm out on the second half of six half-pieces of French
toast. I never had French toast from IHOP that tasted so good.
Note that this algorithm doesn’t apply well to liquids in bottles or
glasses because subdividing a body of liquid is not only time consuming
but messy. This algorithm lends itself well to two-dimensional food items
cut with the side of a fork because you are making cuts there anyway.
--Todd
xfut => lugnet.off-topic.geek
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I feel privaleged to be present when this important algorithm was created. But,
I am not so sure that Todd’s very important contribution into the consumption of
food and to the further appreciation of the culinary delights is really as
limited as he thinks. As an expert in liquid handling (both at a water treatment
plant and a wastewater reclamation facility) his statement that it does not
apply to liquids is shortsighted. With the proper creation of “Lehman Pitchers
and Holding Bottles” and bottles of cosistant weight and the addition of
“Armstrong Hidden Containers” I am quite sure that a with proper weight sensors
and LEGO pneumatically controlled valves and a LEGO “Hidden Container transport
system created by a confluence of the minds of the Robotics experts in the
community, that such an important algorithm is not limited to 2 dimensional food
items.
The import of this discovery by Mr Lehman should not be overlooked. After all a
Nobel Prize was won with the gaming theory.
One could easily envision a system where this algorithm could greatly enhance
the imbibement of multidimensional beverages. In fact one could imagine where
differing qualites (and hence different costs) of liquid refreshment could be
included to maximize the delight at a minimalization of the cost. One would of
course start out with the highest quality and then progress to the lesser
quality stuff as the senses became dulled. But using the concept of hidden
containers, one would always end with the last sip being of the higher quality
material and therefore one would leave the session with the best “after session
taste” on one’s palate.
The only other thing that Mr. Lehman misrepresents in his very important
contribution is, I think, that he views food as 2-dimensional where in fact it
is multi-dimensional with each property of a food as being not only a property
in the traditional “C” concept but rather as a multidimensional matrix where
each combination of the various properties define a new dimension.
Tommy Armstrong
BrickEngraver
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