Subject:
|
Re: Final draft of the letter?
|
Newsgroups:
|
lugnet.color
|
Date:
|
Wed, 1 Dec 2004 01:44:56 GMT
|
Viewed:
|
973 times
|
| |
|
|
"James Wilson" <wilson_j_s@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:I805EB.1wMK@lugnet.com...
> Hey, David,
> After giving it a quick read, I've got two suggestions:¬
> 1) I don't see anything wrong with addressing the letter to a [real • person],
> ideally the CEO of LEGO (whose name escapes me at the moment). I think a
> personally-addressed letter makes a greater impact than a letter addressed • to
> "Lego Company." Now, I don't know the ins and outs of corporate • communication,
> and big companies might say it makes no difference, but I think if I got • 500
> letters addressed to [me] rather than generically, I'd be more likely to • sit up
> and notice.
I totally agree, James. I tried to leave most of that part of the letter
blank for others better informed on these formalities to make suggestions.
> 2) The sentence in the second paragraph that begins, "Having
> consistent..." -- seems a bit passive to me. I'm not sure of a "better"
> construction, but something like, "My enjoyment of buying and collecting • your
> product would be enhanced if your company would maintain a consistent • color
> palette and manufacturing process." It puts the emphasis on the • [personal]
> relationship the writer has with the recipient, and puts the word • ["buying"] in
> there - they need to remember that this is an economic decision for us. • It
> might also translate better, but that's just a supposition.
Excellent suggestion, I will make the changes and have another draft posted
shortly.
> That's just my $0.02 worth.¬
> James Wilson¬
> Dallas, TX¬
> LEGO fan since 1970
|
|
Message is in Reply To:
 | | Re: Final draft of the letter?
|
| Hey, David, After giving it a quick read, I've got two suggestions: 1) I don't see anything wrong with addressing the letter to a real person, ideally the CEO of LEGO (whose name escapes me at the moment). I think a personally-addressed letter makes (...) (20 years ago, 30-Nov-04, to lugnet.color, FTX)
|
8 Messages in This Thread:
  
- Entire Thread on One Page:
- Nested:
All | Brief | Compact | Dots
Linear:
All | Brief | Compact
|
|
|
|
