Subject:
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Re: FINALLY! I started on my story!
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Newsgroups:
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lugnet.castle
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Date:
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Thu, 13 Mar 2003 19:21:35 GMT
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Viewed:
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785 times
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Joey.. this is a pretty good start to your story. Several pieces of advice:
1. proof read it seems you've got a lot of problems with contractions. For
instance you use "its" when it should be "it's" (or "it is").. similiar with
'your' v. you're (you are), and thats v. that's (that is). Also i noticed an
error of 'piece' instead of 'peace.' Something like that a spell checker won't
catch.
2. divide up your story pages more. for the first chapter, you have two pages
when four or maybe more would have been better. it is tiring scrolling down
endlessly.
Otherwise this is a really cool story, and i look forward to more! -Lenny
In lugnet.castle, Joey Finnell writes:
> Hi all,
>
> I finally got off my butt, and got something finished, ok well I know it
> needs more writing but hey at least I got something done :-P so here it is,
> I'm on
> a roll, more soon to come
>
> http://www.angelfire.com/wizard/of_the_ages/Story.html
>
> just click quest
>
> and by all means, LMKWYT
>
> laterz
>
> Joey
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Message is in Reply To:
 | | FINALLY! I started on my story!
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| Hi all, I finally got off my butt, and got something finished, ok well I know it needs more writing but hey at least I got something done :-P so here it is, I'm on a roll, more soon to come (URL) click quest and by all means, LMKWYT laterz Joey (22 years ago, 10-Mar-03, to lugnet.castle)
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