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 Castle / Castle Organizations / Castle World / 1308
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Subject: 
Re: Land Ho, An Isle of Mist story
Newsgroups: 
lugnet.castle.org.cw
Date: 
Thu, 15 Nov 2001 01:31:24 GMT
Viewed: 
3277 times
  
In lugnet.castle.org.cw, Shiri Dori writes:
> Hi Cale!!
> 
> The story gives a good introduction to the main characters. Good job! I like
> the little exposition about Joshua and Catherine's past, and yet you manage
> to keep Catherine seem a bit secretive. An air of mystery around her motives.
Thanks for the compliments. I'm not sure where I'm going with the story yet.
I guess that might depend a little on what we find once the mist starts
receeding.

> I tend to agree with Jeff - proofreading your work adds a lot to the story.
> Try to make sure you close every pair of quotation marks. There are plenty
> of places in the story where I would add commas. Try to read the story out
> loud - whenever you stop for a second, there should be a comma.
And thanks to all of you for the advice. Grammer was not my best subject in
school.

> Good luck! Can't wait to see what you come up with. Also, if you have any
> questions about the area you've landed on, feel free to ask me. I'm the
> story guide of that area.
Oh No! I can't take this kind of pressure :-)

Cale



Message has 1 Reply:
  Re: Land Ho, An Isle of Mist story
 
(...) I'd strongly suggest everyone's characters/parties have a goal for going to the Isle. It doesn't have to be earth-shattering or anything, just an ulterior motive that guides what they'll do and how they'll react to situations they encounter. (...) (25 years ago, 15-Nov-01, to lugnet.castle.org.cw)

Message is in Reply To:
  Re: Land Ho, An Isle of Mist story
 
(...) Hi Cale!! The story gives a good introduction to the main characters. Good job! I like the little exposition about Joshua and Catherine's past, and yet you manage to keep Catherine seem a bit secretive. An air of mystery around her motives. I (...) (25 years ago, 14-Nov-01, to lugnet.castle.org.cw)

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