Subject:
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Land Ho, An Isle of Mist story
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Newsgroups:
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lugnet.castle.org.cw
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Date:
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Wed, 14 Nov 2001 02:33:20 GMT
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Viewed:
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669 times
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This is just a teeny, tiny, not so much that anyone would notice bit late,
but I finally got around to Writing a story about my character's arrival on
the Isle of mist. http://www.lugnet.com/~271/IsleofMist/Chaptrer1 I'm not a
practiced story teller so any feedback would be appreciated.
I also wrote some profiles for my characters, and a description of their
airship. http://www.lugnet.com/~271/IsleofMist/ Hope you enjoy.
For the record, my party landed on 10/20.
Cale
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Message has 4 Replies: | | Re: Land Ho, An Isle of Mist story
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| (...) Sounds good so far! I do have a few suggestions, though. ;) First, the last paragraph is way too long. It really needs to be broken up a bit. Also, you may want to print out some hard copies and get people to make corrections. That should help (...) (23 years ago, 14-Nov-01, to lugnet.castle.org.cw)
| | | Re: Land Ho, An Isle of Mist story
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| (...) Hi Cale!! The story gives a good introduction to the main characters. Good job! I like the little exposition about Joshua and Catherine's past, and yet you manage to keep Catherine seem a bit secretive. An air of mystery around her motives. I (...) (23 years ago, 14-Nov-01, to lugnet.castle.org.cw)
| | | Re: Land Ho, An Isle of Mist story
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| (...) Nice! Very, very nice! I enjoyed reading it immensely. Everybody is giving you advice, so I guess I will too... Mine would be: just run it through Microsoft Word. That's what I do with my stories, and they rarely have any errors now. :) -- (...) (23 years ago, 14-Nov-01, to lugnet.castle.org.cw)
| | | Re: Land Ho, An Isle of Mist story
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| (...) I like your story, and I like the set-up of your page right now - the pictures are vivid, and it is evident that a lot of work went into putting in the details of the ship - kudos on the extra effort. You also have a good mix of characters and (...) (23 years ago, 14-Nov-01, to lugnet.castle.org.cw)
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