Subject:
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Re: It can never end can it
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Newsgroups:
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lugnet.people.support
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Date:
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Wed, 8 Dec 2004 04:39:32 GMT
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Viewed:
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2411 times
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In lugnet.people.support, Jamie Obrien wrote:
> hi, right now im in a really badddddd palce. i know its poretty much the
> end. it just amazes me however at the stupid things that people do and
> say, even people whose job it is to help, when they come across someone
> who is obviously not well.
>
> case: in the last 24 hours 4 lugnetters (i have confirmed, and evn know
> who they are) bombarded one of my email accounts with trash and bs. so
> far im rather proud i havent retaliated, though the people that will
> follow and try and work out what went wrong, are reall bad asses. And
> considering the threats you guys (the aformentioned) dished, jail time
> is the least of your worries. And considering the family histories of at
> least 2 of you......
>
> Also, these stupid,STUPID people whose job it is to help. treat me like
> an idiot and of course im not going to take you seriously. you shouldn't
> even think about joking about guns, and the mere mentioning of it should
> have set every alarm bell offm but no.... Lets joke about it.... Need
> help, need attentionm how about a shooting spree !!!!!!!!!!! from a
> moron i may see the tiniest scerick of the australian dark humour
> peeking through, but you were serious, a professional at that. And
> yesterday... yes i can't shoot weapons anymore without them being
> modified, and i cant afford to eat, or see a doctor, let alone get an
> armourer to mod the Glock. But good point, police are always looking for
> a reason to shoot, just wave the Glock in their general direction, and
> they'll give you satisfaction. THhough with the low proficienccy rate of
> the Queensland Police Service it may take a few tries. (OK that ws a low
> shot). Its apparently called 'Death by Cop,' didn't know that before.
>
> it just doesnt end. the crying shaking everything, and people don't
> help. They like to think they do, guess they need to fell better
> thinking they achieved something than actually doing anything.
>
> medication, well, russian roulette is more beneficial. zoloft has got to
> be the greatest mistake i've ever made, but hey the doctors know what
> they are doing? and now the cold sweats and vomiting kick in. there's
> not a hole anyweher deepenough for me to crawl into to hide. boucing
> between the highs and lows, in mere seconds has got to be one of the
> most difficult things to explain. i dont understand how or why, so how
> can people expect me to explain, there isn't a way unless you've
> experiewnced it. something i now understand.
>
> i could never understand how people on tv could have these 'problems,'
> is it just all in their heads. YES, but now alot of these bizarre acts
> even self mutilation, i understand. anything to feel, to tryt and
> resturn to a better time, but it's only a fleeting glimpse of what won't
> come back, and it just makes it worse, the realisation that it can't be
> returned.
>
> ive screwed myself up, and invariably screwed up alot of people along
> the way. to those fine people i apolagise and regret my ever becoming
> the poison which i now understand i have become.
> I truely am Sorry.
>
>
> all leading to the final realistion.........
> sorry
> jamie
Jamie, I know I cant do anything to help the way you feel at this moment, but I
can not leave this post unanswered. There are people that do understand.
During the moments of deep depression, where every low you feel, and every bit
of pain seems overwhelming. Every moment of desperation feels like it is
unbearable. You are not alone, even if you feel that you are.
If the dosage of medicine isn't working for you and causing such a physical
reaction, you need to get medical attention, so they can regulate your meds, and
so you can find peace.
It is possible, but I know it just doesn't feel like it at times.
It's a road to hell and back, but the shear fact that you reach out is proof
enough to me that you have so much more to share and give and accomplish.
If you want to talk, please feel free to email me.
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