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Subject: 
Re: It can never end can it
Newsgroups: 
lugnet.people.support
Date: 
Thu, 9 Dec 2004 04:52:40 GMT
Viewed: 
2477 times
  
Hi, Jamie.

My name’s Mike. I’m the guy who made the first post in LUGNET/People/Support. I know what it feels like to have life come crashing down on top of you. I know what it’s like to have things suddenly turn dark, for all the fun and joy to get yanked out from under your feet. I’m not sure how many people around here know this, but I’m a cancer survivor. For me, my enemy was invisible. Yeah, it showed up on scans and stuff, but it’s not like it was an actual person I could get mad at. It wasn’t some jerk that I could walk up to and say, “hey, cut it out. Why are you doing this to me?” That made it even more frustrating – not to be able to put a face to my torment. But, let me tell you something: directing our anger toward others, or even ourselves, during times of darkness and pain accomplishes nothing. All it does is add to the pain. Instead of acting as a release, it only breeds more sadness and pull us down even further.

You seem to be caught in a very rough place, and my advice is that you take a moment to sit back, reflect, and attempt to focus on something that makes you happy. Not something that just takes away your pain, but something that makes you happy. You see, there’s a difference. Pain is a funny thing. After a while, when you’ve been in pain for such a long time, it wears you down. You start believing that whatever can take away your pain is a step in the right direction. But, that’s not always true. Yeah, pain sucks. Throughout my twenties (I’m 28 now), I was poked with needles, hooked up to IV’s, pumped full of chemicals, blasted with radiation, subjected to the horrible side effects of medications, operated on many, many times, and almost died on several occasions. I’ve spent months inside isolated, germ-free rooms, away from people, awake all night with insomnia and in pain, in the dark, with only my own confused and battered consciousness to keep me company. I’ve been asked to give everything I can give, and then, I was asked to give even more. I’ve been to hell and back. But, trust me, you can come back. And, you can be happy again.

The trick: you need to accept your pain. You don’t have to learn to live with it, you just have to accept that it’s yours to deal with. I’m not saying that you shouldn’t fight your pain, because you definitely should. You should fight your pain with all your heart and soul. You need to fight, because giving up or giving in means you’re weak. And, you’re not weak. You seem damn tough to me. You’ve been dealt a load of crap in your life, and you don’t deserve it. No one deserves it. But, trust me, you’re lucky. You’ve got a great opportunity here. You’ve got a chance to become a person much greater than you could have ever imagined. If you pull yourself through this mess, life will be different forever, I guarantee it. You’ll be one of us: one of the few for whom life instantly becomes a piece of cake. From then on, no matter what gets tossed into your path, it’s nothing you won’t be able handle. You’ll be a king. Don’t give up now. Push through and succeed. You deserve to beat this. You deserve to get better. You deserve to feel happy.

You’re pain is not your enemy. The people in your life who’ve wronged you are not your enemy. You are not your enemy. The only enemy is that little voice that’s telling you to quit. Reject that voice. See your doctor. Medicine works. Ignore the people who seek to bring more hardship into your world. They don’t realize just how much their actions affect you. Try as hard as you can to focus on the awesome life you could have once you pull though this mess. You can be happy. You deserve to be happy. Forget those jerks that are giving you a hard time. They don’t know what it’s like to be where you are right now. A few years from now, when you’re walking tall and on top of the world, you won’t even remember them. They’re insignificant. The only thing important right now is that you get better. And, getting better means that you have to direct all your attention toward solving your problems, not just getting rid of them. To solve your problems, you have to face them. It’s hard, I know. But, once you’ve faced them, you’ll own them, and from then on you can deal with them, and overcome them. Do it, Jaime. Get better. I want you to get better.

-Mike “Count Blockula” Crowley



Message has 1 Reply:
  Re: It can never end can it
 
(...) Hi all who read this and also to Jamie... First of all, I don't want Jamie (or others) to take this the wrong way, because my intention is not to hurt but to help. I am friends with Jamie and I occassionaly chat to him, unfortunately most of (...) (20 years ago, 17-Feb-05, to lugnet.people.support, FTX)

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