Subject:
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Re: A cry for help !
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Newsgroups:
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lugnet.castle
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Date:
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Sun, 20 Jul 2003 20:44:09 GMT
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Viewed:
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540 times
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I'm not usually interested in the stories. I like viewing the pictures.
Using my slanted opinion to give advice, I would recommend doing everything
in a comic book style. Put the dialog in the pictures!
-Aaron
"Joey Finnell" <punx842003@yahoo.com> wrote in message
news:HI390M.H1F@lugnet.com...
> Hi all
>
> I was hoping that some of you could maybe give me a few pointers on what I
> should do to improve my poor writing skills, I feel that I need to improve
> before I go any farther in illustrating my story so any help you guys can give
> me on this subject would be greatly appriciated, thanx in advance. heres a
> sample of my writing:
>
> As dawn broke, the land seemed very quiet, not much was heard except for a soft
> roar of a near by waterfall. It had been several days since our travelers had
> seen any sign of goblin activity. Several moments later Nevfang's scouting hawk
> flew in from a night of watching over the landscape. "{|My dear friend what is
> it?|} " asked Nevfang looking up at the bird. Then as if understanding the hawks
> every word Nevfang looked to a hill side very far away. Focusing on a couple of
> trees he spotted a small group of goblins who were at closest 1500 yards in the
> distance. Then in an instant the hill side became covered with goblins.
>
> "{|Oh No........|}" whispered the elf in fear as he rushed to his companions to
> warn them of the danger which seemed to be pouring down the hill.
>
> "{|Victor, Eric, Mudd, Malak...|}" Nevfang shouted running into camp.
>
> "{|What's the matter?|} " asked Victor who had risen to his feet.
>
> "{|...Goblins,|}" Nevfang stated, "{|At the top of the hill....|}"
>
> "{|Well alright then|}" said Mudd interrupting his elf friend, "{|Let us kill
> some goblins shall we?|} " he continued as he unsheathed his sword.
>
> "{|Oh.....really, do you plan to take on the intire goblin force by yourself?|}
> " ask Nevfang looking at his friend as if he were ignorant.
>
> "{|Well since you put it that way, I'm up for suggestions.|}" replied Mudd
> sheathing his sword and leaning against his 3 headed hound.
>
> "{|We haven't got many other options...|}" stated Victor looking up towards the
> hill.
>
> "{|I'll stand by you until the very end my brother.|}" said Malak bravely
> placing his hand on Victor's shoulder.
>
> "{|Greatly out numbered huh?|} " Mudd responded quickly "{|Count me in, I always
> did love a good challange.|}"
>
> "{|What say you Eric?|} " asked Victor turning to his friend who had been
> meditating on a rock, without the slightest movement.
>
> "{|Well.....|}", as the wizard began to speak he vanished, then without warning
> reappeared next to victor and continued to speak, "{|I could never leave my
> companions behind.|}"
>
> "{|You humans are insane...|}", Nevfang paused looking up at the hill. "{|But
> you have alot of spirit...|}"
>
> "{|Shall we then?|} " asked Malak.
>
> "{|Yes, lets hunt some goblins....|}" grinned Victor.
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Message is in Reply To:
| | A cry for help !
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| Hi all I was hoping that some of you could maybe give me a few pointers on what I should do to improve my poor writing skills, I feel that I need to improve before I go any farther in illustrating my story so any help you guys can give me on this (...) (21 years ago, 15-Jul-03, to lugnet.castle, FTX)
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