Subject:
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Re: I'll be back when LUGNET has less flame. I've had enough.
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Newsgroups:
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lugnet.people
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Date:
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Mon, 8 Jul 2002 04:35:17 GMT
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Viewed:
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1081 times
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Christopher Weeks wrote:
> > We're also participating in a hobby which the general populace thinks is
> > "weird". And our demographics probably make us more susceptible to being
> > worried about being "weird".
>
> I dunno. Most people view all hobbies outside their own as weird.
Hmm, I think there are many hobbies which are generally respected:
- mainstream sports (as a fan or player - golf, baseball,[American]
football, hockey, tennis, swimming, running, diving)
- hiking and camping
- sewing, needlepoint, knitting, and such (for women)
- computer gaming
- watching movies and plays
- acting
- listening to or making music
- reading (most genres)
- gardening
- woodworking
and many more.
Model railroading is on the edge, I think it's gained a lot of
respectability, but people certainly used to be accused of "playing with
toys."
> > I sometimes wonder why I continue to be active myself. Fortunately,
> > every once in a while, someone posts a response to one of my posts which
> > makes me feel good.
>
> That's interesting. I don't ever wonder why I continue, but I drop away and
> come back fairly cyclicly. I do wonder why others don't value the links and
> MOCs and conversation and news. I think LUGNET rocks!
For myself, I know I have been under a lot of stress over the past
couple years, and this reduces the energy I have to deal with stress in
my hobbies. I think I'm more susceptible to Lugnet's ups and downs
because I put so much into community building. As a result, the
flamewars hit me even if I am not the one being roasted, and I take the
existence of flamewars somewhat personally. So what I am really
questioning is the energy I put into community building here, but I'm
unlikely to just participate on sidelines.
As to the links and MOCs, I just feel it's harder to find them amidst
the other noise. Perhaps it's not really any different since my early
days are somewhat colored by a job where I was very under utilized and
could spend half my day reading Lugnet and organizing my links pages
(and thinking about how much more LEGO sorting I could get done if I
felt I could bring it into work).
> > I also consider whether other factors in my life are
> > the real cause of my feeling cruddy and try not to let Lugnet get to me
> > too much, but I also wonder how much of an energy drain Lugnet is.
>
> Seeing the great work that everyone else does and reading their opinions is
> really invigorating for me. I don't always take the time to look at
> everything, but I'm continually impressed by how creative everyone is.
>
> > The good thing is that I've had nothing but positive feelings about all
> > the PNLTC activities I've participated in since I started my journey to
> > Oregon (including the seedling planted almost three years ago). I'm also
> > having positive feelings around my church activity. Sadly, I'm not
> > feeling so great about RPGs or caving (though in the case of caving, I'm
> > suspecting I'm passing on from that stage of my life - in part, I think
> > caving is not as good a social outlet as my other interests).
>
> I'm having a hard time getting psyched for RPGs anymore. I keep buying the new
> and interesting ones and reading them, but I haven't played in a long time.
> And I'm not interested in a bad one. I like the idea of a good one, but so
> much time is involved...
The time certainly is a negative factor for me, but there is an
intellectual interraction which I am finding hard to replace. For a
while, I got a lot out of .debate, but the debates just seemed to always
get stuck in the same place.
> I still don't know what to take away from the public "I'm leavings." I've
> always been conflicted -- thinking on the one hand that the best way to handle
> it is a "buh-bye" (or silence) so as not to encourage themir childish
> theatrics, and on the other that even if it does seem childish, it's a result
> of their pain and it would be nice to help. But how? And I still wonder if
> it's really a loss.
I agree that in some cases, the quitter probably won't be missed. What
worries me is when a long term member quits. I tend try and look for
motivations behind behavior, and I feel that people generally don't act
out like this if they aren't really feeling some pain. Now what we often
don't know is what else may be going on in their lives. I think a
motivation though for these theatrics is not just feeling bad about
themselves, but feeling bad about the rest of the community.
(1) Every once in a while, I get into a discussion about Meyers-Briggs
personality types, and people are surprised when I say that I'm an ENFP.
But the more I look at what motivates me in life, the more I am sure I
really am an E (though I can also play an INTJ pretty well, which is
what throws people). But at the end of the day, I thrive on being in
community with a group of people (when I was most active as a youth
advisor, I would show up on nights that I wasn't scheduled for just to
be with more people).
Frank
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