Subject:
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Re: Go ahead, make my day!
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Newsgroups:
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lugnet.off-topic.debate
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Date:
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Wed, 25 Jul 2001 19:11:39 GMT
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Viewed:
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929 times
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In lugnet.off-topic.debate, Bruce Schlickbernd writes:
> I have seen an amazing parade of statements claiming I said this or that, or
> challenging me on things I didn't say
With this in mind, and in order to eliminate further confusion,I've
compiled the following small (and by no means complete) list.
On one or more occasions Bruce has claimed:
1) that he can freeze or boil water in his bare hands
2) that he can get a single olive out of a jar with one finger
3) that apples and oranges really *can* be compared
4) that he is responsible for all those crop circles
5) that he was abducted by aliens during the summer of 1999
6) that he abducted aliens during the autumn of 1999
7) that you don't really need vowels in your last name
8) that he invented the process by which toothpaste tubes are rolled
9) that "Hannah" is really "Bob" spelled backwards
10) that time goes faster if you move really slowly
11) that he once owned a sled named Rosebud
12) that the use of the word "proactive" is punishable by death
13) that he can bend his elbows in either direction
14) that he personally witnessed the sinking of Titanic
15) that he can dog-paddle for hours at a time
16) that Ginzu knives aren't really as sharp as the commercials say
17) that he has a signed original copy of "On The Road"
18) that he voted for Pierce in the election of 1852
19) that it is best to Buy Low and to Sell High
20) that chicken bones should not be given to dogs
21) that his first name is an anagram of "cherub"
22) that he used to work at a lumbermill in Wisconsin
23) that clowns and mimes should be watched with suspicion
24) that he is invisible when no one is looking at him
25) that toads are smarter than frogs
26) that his teeth are constantly replaced, like a sharks
27) that celophane can be used to make inexpensive under-garments
28) that rock does not beat scissors, nor does paper beat rock
29) that he was overlooked in the 1998 NFL draft
30) that DNA evidence has completely exonerated him
There are more, to be sure, but I've got other work to do...
Dave!
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Message has 2 Replies: ![](/news/x.gif) | | Re: Go ahead, make my day!
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| (...) But not above 6000 feet! (...) You poke your pinky into the hole - don't try and actually grab it. (...) They are both fruits - now, apples and coproliths... (...) Just spinning my Miata in tight circles, honest officer! (...) I was (...) (23 years ago, 25-Jul-01, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
| ![](/news/x.gif) | | Re: Go ahead, make my day!
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| "Dave Schuler" <orrex@excite.com> wrote in message news:GH1MnF.2nz@lugnet.com... (...) that, or (...) confusion,I've (...) <snip> (...) I have to agree with him on that one. Clowns and mimes are the lowest form of life and deserve closer scrutiny. (...) (23 years ago, 25-Jul-01, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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Message is in Reply To:
![](/news/x.gif) | | Re: Go ahead, make my day!
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| (...) Richard's statement that I was responding to refered to "No one here...", i.e. he was refering to the respondents in the collective. I replied in the collective, which Richard seems to have missed. I'm not going to reply to Richard's message (...) (23 years ago, 25-Jul-01, to lugnet.off-topic.debate)
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