Subject:
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Re: Governor Ventura Top Ten List
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Newsgroups:
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lugnet.off-topic.fun
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Date:
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Mon, 9 Nov 1998 21:22:02 GMT
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Viewed:
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425 times
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I canceled the first posting of this list, here it is again, more
appropriately clipped.
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T H E T O P F I V E L I S T
Where the laughs don't stop on Election Day
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November 5, 1998
The Top 13 Changes Under a Government Run by Pro Wrestlers
13> Driving your fellow Congressman into the turnbuckle now
considered acceptable method of ending a filibuster.
12> President now shouts entire State of the Union address
with his face 18 inches from TV camera.
11> IRS audit replaced by more efficient reverse body slam
onto enema.
10> Government becomes a charade of meaningless noises and
lots of posturing by a bunch of inarticulate losers with
no class or manners-- Hey, wait a minute...
9> Free school lunches destined for the needy instead go to
the biggest, meanest, stupidest kid in each school.
8> Sex scandals now involve even skankier women.
7> January 20: Inauguration ceremonies
January 21: FDA approves over-the-counter sale of steroids
6> Newt Gingrich is finally able to wear his mask and cape
out of the house.
5> During House debate, it is acceptable to yield to the
gentleman wielding a folding chair.
4> Difficult finding interns willing to accommodate an entire
pouch of Skoal.
3> Strom Thurmond *finally* removed by The Undertaker.
2> Line to bodyslam Ken Starr winds around Lincoln Memorial.
and Top5's Number 1 Change Under a
Government Run by Pro Wrestlers...
1> Before: Mr. Vice President After: Stone Cold Al Gore
[ This list copyright 1998 by Chris White ]
[ The Top 5 List top5@gmbweb.com http://www.topfive.com ]
[ To forward or repost, please include this section. ]
[ You like to receive credit for your work, and so do we. ]
Selected from 108 submissions from 37 contributors.
Today's Top Five List authors are:
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Lloyd Jacobson, Washington, DC -- 1 (12th #1)
Andrew Thomas, Omaha, NE -- 2
Doug Johnson, Santa Cruz, CA -- 3 (Hall of Famer)
Don Swain, Waterford, MI -- 4
Jason Anderson, Birmingham, AL -- 5
David G. Scott, Kansas City, MO -- 5
Jon Litfin, Columbus, OH -- 6
Alan Wagner, Pittsburg, KS -- 7
Yoram Puius, Bronx, NY -- 8, 10
Gerard McDonald, New Haven, CT -- 9
Perry Friedman, Menlo Park, CA -- 10
Jim Rosenberg, Greensboro, NC -- 10
Mark Weiss, Austin, TX -- 11, 12
Geoff Brown, Farmington Hills, MI -- 13
Eric Huret, Atlanta, GA -- 13, Topic
Mark Schmidt, Santa Cruz, CA -- Banner Tag
Kevin Freels, Burbank, CA -- Runner Up list name
Chris White, New York, NY -- List owner/editor
Niacin, Los Angeles, CA -- Ambience
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"The Legistators of Death!"
The Runners Up and Honorable Mention submissions for
today's list can be found at: http://www.topfive.com
================================================================
Subscribe? Send a blank message to: join-top5@lists.lyris.net
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Message is in Reply To:
 | | Re: Governor Ventura Top Ten List
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| From Real Fans Sports Network: Top Ten changes Jesse "The Body" Ventura will make as Minnesota's governor 10. His receptionist will give him his messages by walking around the office, clad in a g-string and holding up ring cards. CTSTARSKY 9. (...) (26 years ago, 8-Nov-98, to lugnet.off-topic.fun)
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