Subject:
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Groan of the week #26
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Newsgroups:
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lugnet.off-topic.pun
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Date:
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Tue, 1 Oct 2002 05:23:48 GMT
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Viewed:
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1948 times
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In all the world no man was more blessed than Khu, the Grand Shan of Tartary -
nor more cursed.
None exceeded him in power or riches, the breadth of his domain, the virtues of
his wife, and the vices of his concubines. Such were his blessings, but heed ye
his curse.
For Khu, the Grand Shan, suffered from epilepsy, which men call the "falling
sickness" - an affliction of sudden seizures, of convulsions occurring without
warning.
Like many great rulers, the Shan had enemies. And it remained for one, whose
name was Ling-Po, to discover the cause of his curse. The Shan, a learned and
intelligent man, was unusually sensitive to crude japes and mindless jests. It
was on occasions when he was exposed to such idiocies - most notably in the
form of puns - that he became enraged, and thus responsive to his seizures.
Knowing this, Ling-Po devised what is called, in the heathen lands of the West,
a "shaggy dog" story - a witless and revolting piece of nonsense designed to
lead the unsuspecting reader to a "punchline" in the form of a truly disgusting
pun. This particular story might well sicken any reader - and in the case of
someone susceptible to epileptic seizures, it might even bring about his death.
Ling-Po inscribed his work on a scroll of parchment inserted in a golden tube,
and personally presented it to the Shan as a birthday gift from an anonymous
admirer.
Presently it came to pass that the Shan unrolled the scroll. Ling-Po waited,
his heart pounding in uncertainty as the Shan began to read. Would the Shan
indeed experience an epileptic seizure when he came upon the filthy pun at the
end?
The reading concluded, and for a moment Ling-Po waited, wondering if he had
failed. But he need not have worried, once the pun was read. For it was then
that the fit hit the Shan.
See the complete Groan of the week here:
http://www.lugnet.com/off-topic/pun/~469/
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