Subject:
|
Chuckle
|
Newsgroups:
|
lugnet.off-topic.geek
|
Date:
|
Thu, 22 Sep 2005 19:08:19 GMT
|
Viewed:
|
2209 times
|
| |
|
|
Subject: New discovery....heaviest element known to science!
A major research institution has recently announced the
discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. The new element has
been named "Governmentium."
Governmentium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 11
assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312.
These particles are held together by forces called morons, which are surrounded
by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Governmentium
has no electrons, it is inert.
However, it can be detected, as it impedes every reaction with which it comes
into contact. A minute amount of Governmentium causes 1 reaction to take over
4 days to complete, when it would normally take less than a second.
Governmentium has a normal 1/2-life of 4 years; it does not decay, but instead
undergoes a reorganization in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and
deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Governmentium's mass will actually
increase over time, since each reorganization will cause more morons to become
neutrons, forming isodopes.
This characteristic of moron-promotion leads some scientists to believe that
Governmentium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in
concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as "Critical Morass!"
When catalyzed with money, Governmentium becomes Administratium-an element which
radiates just as much energy, since it has 1/2 as many peons but twice as many
morons.
|
|
Message has 1 Reply:
 | | Re: Chuckle
|
| (...) That's quite the meme there... (URL) first 50 links all appear to be just about word for word repeats of this story if you just go by the result excerpts the page results show (maybe more but that was about as deep as I was willing to go!) (...) (19 years ago, 22-Sep-05, to lugnet.off-topic.geek)
|
3 Messages in This Thread:
 
- Entire Thread on One Page:
- Nested:
All | Brief | Compact | Dots
Linear:
All | Brief | Compact
|
|
|
|
