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Subject: 
Re: Car insurance
Newsgroups: 
lugnet.off-topic.fun
Date: 
Thu, 11 May 2000 22:57:39 GMT
Viewed: 
766 times
  
In lugnet.off-topic.fun, Alex Roode writes:
> This is so funny (I found it on another website):
> 
> The following are actual statements found on insurance forms
> where car drivers attempted to summarize the details of an accident in the
> fewest words possible.
> 
> Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I don't • have.
> 
> The other car collided with mine without giving warning of its intentions.
> 
> I thought the window was down, but I found out it was up when I put my head
> through it.
> 
> I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way.
> 
> A truck backed through my windshield into my wife's face.
> 
> A pedestrian hit me and went under my car.
> 
> The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before I hit
> him.
> 
> I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and
> headed over the embankment.
> 
> In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
> 
> I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home.
> 
> As I reached an intersection, a hedge sprang up, obscuring my vision and I did
> not see the other car.
> 
> I had been driving for forty years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an
> accident.
> 
> I was on my way to the doctor with rear-end trouble when my universal joint
> gave way causing me to have an accident.
> 
> As I approached the intersection a sign suddenly appeared in a place where no
> stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to stop in time to avoid the
> accident.
> 
> To avoid hitting the bumper of the car in front, I struck the pedestrian.
> 
> My car was legally parked as it backed into the other vehicle.
> 
> An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car, and vanished.
> 
> I told the police that I was not injured, but on removing my hat, found that I
> had a fractured skull.
> 
> I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side of the road
> when I struck him.
> 
> The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him.
> 
> I saw a slow moving, sad faced old gentlemen as he bounced off the roof of my
> car.
> The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car with a big
> mouth.
> 
> I was thrown from my car as it left the road. I was later found in a ditch by
> some stray cows.
> 
> The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of its way
> when it struck the front end.
> 
> HAHAHAHHAH!
> 
> Alex

come on, this is SO funny! somebody reply!



Message has 4 Replies:
  Re: Car insurance
 
(...) I thought this stuff was humorous until I was involved in two auto accidents, one involving a small child. (1) Sorry, but somehow these don't make me chuckle any more... Cheers, - jsproat 1. Don't worry -- the kid came out all right. (26 years ago, 11-May-00, to lugnet.off-topic.fun)
  Re: Car insurance
 
(...) It is pretty funny. It's also REALLY old.... I first saw this in a book from the 1970s.... (26 years ago, 11-May-00, to lugnet.off-topic.fun)
  Re: Car insurance
 
(...) I lresonate with Sproat's answer. Here's another one: I agree, it WAS funny, the first time I read it. But that was probably when I was about YOUR age, and I've seen it a few times since then. Alex, thanks for posting it, but "current news of (...) (26 years ago, 12-May-00, to lugnet.off-topic.fun)
  Re: Car insurance
 
(...) <snip!> (...) <snip!> According to the Driver's Ed classes i took, this guy did nothing wrong. I quote: "If an accident is unavoidable, always aim for the softest target." My friend specifically asked if that included people... (...) Sorry, I (...) (26 years ago, 12-May-00, to lugnet.off-topic.fun)

Message is in Reply To:
  Car insurance
 
This is so funny (I found it on another website): The following are actual statements found on insurance forms where car drivers attempted to summarize the details of an accident in the fewest words possible. Coming home I drove into the wrong house (...) (26 years ago, 10-May-00, to lugnet.off-topic.fun)

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