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Subject: 
Re: Kingdom of Gatimrja - Chapter II
Newsgroups: 
lugnet.castle
Date: 
Thu, 11 Jul 2002 19:13:26 GMT
Viewed: 
2064 times
  
Thanks for the comments.

Fear not, the Prince will return.  I've gotten a lot of positive reactions
to him, so I have no plans to cut him out of the story.  Unfortunately,
there are two more chapters before he comes back into the picture.
Although, I might try to re-introduce him sooner, either in a side chapter,
or by cutting back and forth between him and the main action.  I also need
to do a bit more with Duke Folquets.

You're right though, there wasn't enough done to show why everyone was so
flustered with Herold.  I will try to add more to the chapter to make up for
this.

I had been trying to keep these first few chapters as short as possible,
because really, they're just exposition.  I was afraid they would devolve in
to a long series of mini-figs just standing around and talking, which is not
the most interesting use of lego (well, depending on the dialogue, i rather
like it, but I am trying to keep it at a minimum, as it's not everyone's
favorite part of lego stories).  I see that I may have erred on the side of
too little.  I will try to keep the additions interesting, though.

--William
http://home.earthlink.net/~ynpw/index.html


In lugnet.castle, Leonard Hoffman writes:
> great story! excellent use of simple backgrounds!
> 
> criticism: the whole thing about the prince. it pops up at the end of chap. 1
> and ends shortly into chap. 2. hopefully this means its not a dead subplot,
> because i don't see where its going.  also you say the prince is annoying, but
> don't show us. what was he doing that was so annoying, etc? make it so we feel
> the annoyance the same as the other characters.
> 
> aside from that and excellent contribution to an excellent burgeoning saga!
> 
> i look forward to more!
> -lenny



Message is in Reply To:
  Re: Kingdom of Gatimrja - Chapter II
 
great story! excellent use of simple backgrounds! criticism: the whole thing about the prince. it pops up at the end of chap. 1 and ends shortly into chap. 2. hopefully this means its not a dead subplot, because i don't see where its going. also you (...) (24 years ago, 11-Jul-02, to lugnet.castle)

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