Subject:
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Re: Epic of the Beyhadur: The Calling
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Newsgroups:
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lugnet.castle
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Date:
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Fri, 7 Feb 2003 03:18:17 GMT
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Viewed:
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870 times
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> > http://www.lugnet.com/~1168/beyhadur/
> i looked at your epic and.....
> Totally did not understand it. I do not see what the guy in the black and the
> king saying "urk" have to do with each other...the font is rather hard to read,
> and it has alot of reffering to "god."
Setare (the king) said 'urk' because he suddenly got sick, in accord with
Zahan's prophecy (the guy in black) that God would kill him for his
wrong-doing. Setare was being punished by God directly, not by Zahan.
And I know certain parts seem a bit un-clear, but that's because of the
limitations of my particular style. I also believe stories should be as
'bare-bones' as possible- it makes them easier to pick up and read and not get
bogged down with useless details. This is a tricky way to write and has the
possibility to be confusing to some, especially if one isn't a very good writer
to begin with (like me).
all the 'god' references are because my chosen inspiration was the Bible,
specifically Rev. Smith's Brick Testament. Think of the Epic as a
religious-historical story told my Olmans (the nationality of the people in the
story) over hundreds and hundreds of years, and so changes the same way Exodus
probably evolved since the actual events of the Hebrews leaving Egypt.
> It needs more background, and a base for what exacty is going on, as well as a
> smoother font.
Sorry about the font, but it really is what I think the story needs. I feel it
can be difficult at times, but hopefully not completely un-readable. I wanted
something particularly medieval without going into Old English font (which is
almost completely unreadable). In Chapter 1 I used Comic-sans for dialogue,
but I felt it looked too modern. And as far as perfectly clear, readable fonts
go, all are derivative of either Arial or Times New Roman, which are both more
contemporary than medieval in their appearance. Any suggestions for a new font?
As for background, what particular details do you find missing? Most of the
main characters have fairly sparce backgrounds because they change so much
during the story that their former lives barely come into play.
And what do you mean by "a base for what exactly is going on"?
> As for the comic book style, i dont particularly like it. (thats just me, my
> epic will not be in pictures, to many restrictions to just pictures.)
Yes, but there are restrictions in every medium you choose. I lost alot of
character development and inner dialogue, but gained alot by *visual*
story-telling. My hope is that without the words, you can still get an idea of
what is generally happening.
In the future I'm planning other stories that would be less 'grand' in scope,
and I'd be able to better display the visual-story telling concept.
> My criticism, as you asked, is above.
Thank you very much! Much appreciated!
_lenny
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Message is in Reply To:
 | | Re: Epic of the Beyhadur: The Calling
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| (...) i looked at your epic and..... Totally did not understand it. I do not see what the guy in the black and the king saying "urk" have to do with each other...the font is rather hard to read, and it has alot of reffering to "god." It needs more (...) (21 years ago, 7-Feb-03, to lugnet.castle)
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