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Subject: 
Re: Sophie sentenced to 7 years
Newsgroups: 
lugnet.mediawatch
Date: 
Thu, 27 Dec 2012 17:49:27 GMT
Viewed: 
21247 times
  
In lugnet.mediawatch, Felix Greco wrote:
I didnt see this discussed anywhere...
http://www.nj.com/hudson/index.ssf/2012/09/lego_master_sentenced_to_5_yea.html

Yeah, I've been... i don't know... furious isn't the proper word.

More like disappointed.

Every part of society has issues--every hobby, every gathering, every
what-have-you...

And, since this is a hobby and not a company, we can't pick and choose who is a
part of it.

I met Eric at BF2004.  I also corresponded with him via LUGNET in the past and
appreciated his builds.

Here's a tangent which just came up in a discussion recently with friends and
it'll relate as you' ll see (hopefully)

We grew up watching Christmas movies during this time, especially the
classics--Wonderful Life, Miracle on 34th, etc.  But especially White Christmas
and Bells of St Marys--why?  'Cause my dad loved BIng Crosby (and the singing)

But halfway thru my childhood, it became public that Bing had a wee bit of a
drinking problem.  Moreover, he was an angry drunk.  Well, that didin't go over
too well with my dad and Bing was shunned after that.

I'm not like that.  I still love White Christmas.  I still love Bells of St
Mary's.  They really are classic movies.  There were people involved in the
making of these movies that probably also had personal problems/issues that
would dwarf Bing's issues.  And, again, Bing's issues were personal--his
'demons', as it were, and that should have no impact on my enjoyment of his
movies.  I'm not condoning his personal actions by my appreciation of these
movies, nor am I condemning him--his personal issues are not part of my life.

I separate what I see from who he is.  Is like if I found out that the street
sweeper was an abusive drunk, would I stop driving on the roads he cleans?
Nope.  Separate the job from the person.

And that brings us back to Eric.  There's a massive difference here, at least
for us--we're *in* the community that, in my opinion, has been tainted by his
actions.  What he did *has* impacted on all of us.  When the idea of the LEGO
discovery centers not allowing non-kid toting adults into their
buildings--there's a reason for that.  These company decisions were not made
specifically because of Eric's actions, but due to a long list of perceived
inappropriate issues caused by individuals through the years, of which Eric's
actions were one more in the list.

There is a certain 'stigma' associated with this hobby for us adults.  It's a
stigma we've all encountered to one degree or another the minute we were older
than, say, 14.  And that is, 'why, as an adult, are you still playing with a
kids toy?'  We've all heard it, and we try to explain that it's not 'just' a
kids toy, that it's a creative medium that we use, like artists using crayons or
whatever else can be 'mostly' associated with kids stuff.  I've not minded the
occasional 'What?? You still play with LEGO???' when somebody new finds out the
passion I have for my hobby.

However, what can happen... nay, what will happen--is a new stigma associated
with the AFOL community-- and that is, if Eric's actions are repeated by another
individual, (and without actually looking into history, I'm sure it's happened
before, as I'm sure it'll happen again), we, all of us, will be construed by
some, as (and I'll say this as delicately as I can) 'oh, you play with lego to
get access to kids'.

'Won't happen', says the AFOL masses.  Well, the writing's on the wall, as it
were.  It's already happening at discovery centers.  They're floating the idea
of denying adults not accompanied by kids *because* of the inappropriate actions
of a very limited number of individuals.  What the very few did has already
impacted on all of us.

So now what?

There are no easy answers.  None at all.  Since our chosen hobby really has no
rules or regulations or governing body or anything that can constrain the
actions of any individual, or any power to affect changes in anyone, what can we
do to prevent another black mark on the AFOL community?

Time for another tangent--

I was once one of 'those people' that stood at the side of the road with a sign
'Abortion kills children'.  I attended many such silent protests in my youth.

I've since heavily modified my personal perspective on this issue.  I won't go
into details of what I believe now ('cause it really doesn't contribute to this
thread), but the one simple fact that I've come away with for myself though the
intervening years from holding those signs to now is this--

*I* won't put a woman in a position where she has to worry about it.

Me.  Who *I* am.  No woman will ever have to struggle with this very idea
*because of* me.

Not going to happen.

And I've applied this simple concept to, well, my whole life.  No family ever
has to have any fear from me regarding having a family member killed in a DUI
accident.  No one has any fear from *me* of getting shot in a dispute.  No wife
of mine has to worry about getting a phone call saying I was having an affair
with someone.  These things, and so many others, have caused so much
consternation, grief, sorrow in those I love and appreciate, that *I* will never
perform such actions to cause the same grief in ANYONE.

And when I write anyone, I mean ANYONE.  This rule applies to close family
members as well as strangers.  I don't need to personally know an individual to
know that my actions will impact on them.

If you're still with me, there's one more little bit.  See, until now, I've live
my life with the above rule firmly in place *for me*.  However, I've not really
put any effort at all into, well, monitoring or enforcing this on anyone
else--Others can live their lives however they wish.  As for me and my house,
we'll live ours over here.

That said, knowing the negative impact of Sophie's (and others) actions on our
community, I'm going to try and be more diligent in presenting, both privately
and publicly, a better perception of AFOL's.  I don't want to contribute in any
fashion, any negative light on our hobby.

I was going to end this with a quote from Book from Firefly, but I'd rather end
this on a more serious note (since this is, after all, a serious
conversation)--if anyone is struggling with stuff--whether it's in line with
what Eric was charged with, or something else--you have a problem.  When I have
problems, I ask for help.  You need to ask.  Don't let it get to the point when
you're in jail for 7 years and have ruined people's lives.  Ask for help.  From
a close friend, from a counselor... there are always means to get the help you
need.  The longer you leave it, the deeper you'll fond yourself.  I've struggled
with may issues through my life--depression, suicidal thoughts...  Just talking
about it with someone helped.

Knowing you're not alone...

Maybe I will leave this with a quote, but from a better (gasp) show--

Leo McGarry: This guy's walking down a street when he falls in a hole. The walls
are so steep, he can't get out. A doctor passes by, and the guy shouts up, "Hey
you, can you help me out?" The doctor writes a prescription, throws it down in
the hole and moves on. Then a priest comes along, and the guy shouts up "Father,
I'm down in this hole, can you help me out?" The priest writes out a prayer,
throws it down in the hole and moves on. Then a friend walks by. "Hey Joe, it's
me, can you help me out?" And the friend jumps in the hole. Our guy says, "Are
you stupid? Now we're both down here." The friend says, "Yeah, but I've been
down here before, and I know the way out."

Dave K



Message is in Reply To:
  Sophie sentenced to 7 years
 
I didnt see this discussed anywhere... (URL) (12 years ago, 25-Dec-12, to lugnet.mediawatch)  

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